Eye Zone

Monday, February 21st, 2011 at 3:39 am

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How to get out or avoid the friend zone?

ok so i want to get out of the friend zone so that they like me...know how to get out of it i think its flriting with them right?...the problem is what should i do to know that i like themm?....if a girl squents her eyes what does that mean?

See if this sounds familiar?

A friend made an observation about me that I wasn't aware of. When we go out to a party he tells me that women tell him that I am very attractive but boring. His thinking is that the thing that I do differently from most guys is that I don't put off this 'hunter' vibe or energy that a lot of guys do. It frustrates me greatly because at times I feel that it is a liability that I try to come from a place of integrity and decency, as some guys just say and do what they want, without any regard to the consequences. I guess being respectful and nice is mistaken for boring.

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I've only had a couple of good connections with women, and that was a long time ago. What I'm going through now is a period of arrested development. It's as if the sexual component has somehow been taken out of me over the last several years and now I am completely sexually invisible to women.

The one thing I DO feel I lose each time something doesn't work for me is hope --which in turn yields much anger, resentment, and bitterness toward women --it is truly a vicious cycle. Having said that in some ways, I've been a fool to myself and lived in denial about my situation. I think I somehow morphed myself to this place.

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Okay, I want to make this clear upfront. The "cool guys" women want to marry are not the "Bad Boys" who are bad for badness sake. You know who -- the dude with a bad kick-ass attitude who walks up to a woman, looks at her up and down with transparent intentions, and moves up on her with the brashness of a 60s' pimp. Yeah - that one with no class and no soul. [Excuse me for going off again. I just can't hide my dislike for players and their wannabes].

Many women worth the time of the day [unlike one night stand types] can't stand these guys either. Their dream guy is the sensitive, caring, respectful and thoughtful guy with a sprinkle of "Bad Boy" traits.

[I see the look... but whatever!]

Whether you accept it or not, many women are attracted to certain traits -- most abundant in Bad Boys and which often Bad Boys deliver. There is simply no denying it!

But what is it exactly that turns women on and why? Chances are that you, Mr. Nice Guy/Good Guy has all these "Bad Boys" traits -- and don't realize how truly "bad" you are.

1: A Bad Boy sets his own rules

You must feel like you're being ostracized by society because you do not fit the bill of what is considered "Alpha Male". And I am sure that makes you feel constantly judged to a standard you can never measure up to. Most bad boys grew up feeling like they just don't "fit in the box" either. The difference between a Bad Boy and a Nice Guy (like you) is that he has learned to survive in a tough world that constantly judges him and rejects him because he doesn't meet society's standard of a "good boy".

TIP 1 - Set your own dating rules and walk to the beat of your own drum. Women, like all other animals find those of the opposite sex who display great survival skills to be superior. Seeing a man wake up every morning, stand strong, stake his claim, take his chances, put his life on the line even in hostile environments is just sexy to the dizzy limit. It shows that you have your life together and enjoy being alive.

2: A Bad Boy is nobody's punk and nobody's pawn

One of the reasons you're labeled a Nice Guy is because you respect women and treat them with the respect they so rightly deserve (hopefully). It's the reason -- you've been told-- women leave you for Bad Boys. That's so true. But what you may not have been told is that, women want to be respected and treated with respect but they don't find doormats attractive -- doormats are for dusting off our shoes.

TIP 2 - Stand up for yourself --sometimes -- look her in the eye and draw the line in the sand when you have to. A steely core that is not easily manipulated and is uncompromising about the things that matter is attractive -- very. But this should not be something you do like a whiny victim but something you do calmly, rationally and assertively -- and on things that actually matter.

3: A Bad Boy does not pretend to be a saint

We know you are the "good" guys. You don't have to try so hard to prove just how "good" you are. That puppy-like ("please, please, love me") trying so hard to please is too good to a fault. There is only so much "sweetness" that a woman can take before she throws up -- or blows up.

TIP 3 - Just be real with us, that's all we ask. The "romantic saint" act gets so old real quick. We want to see that you accept yourself as you are -- the good, bad and ugly. A guy who accepts himself as he is, is unlikely to critic our own errors, stumbles, weaknesses, scars, and warts so harshly because he knows he is not perfect either.

4: A Bad Boy is never afraid to stand up for what he believes is right

If you are a Nice Guy (not angry and all tha

The Twilight Zone - "Eye of the Beholder" (Part One)